Me Myself & I

Jessica
20 already
23/02/1988
Nanyang Poly
Dip in Mechatronics Engineering

Always follow your heart, not your mind...

Loves

Family
Him
Friends
Basketball
Shopping
Crapping
Sleeping
Chatting

Detest

Ants - more of afraid!!
No Money....
Pimples~~
Skin Peeling....
Backstabbing friends
Bitches
Jerks, Bastards and Assholes
Guys who tinks they are big shots!

Desire

A medium Shetland Sheepdog
My)hosis Shawl
Driving License
Sports Bag
New Bikini
BIG TEDDY BEAR
Digital Camera
Havaianas Slippers
NewUrbanMale Tokyo Singlet
NewUrbanMale Germany Singlet
New Wallet
Tepanyaki Dinner Treat at Pacific Hotel
More Blouses/Shirts

Friends

Tagboard



Those Days
Sunday, November 14, 2004
I cried todae
I'm so sad todae...for the first time i actually cried so hard and loud just like a baby as jaysen had to start comforting mi as if he was tokin to a little kid... mayb i'm realli just a kid at heart wahaha... i sometimes just feel so useless and left out during a game.. esp todae's one..

Wat happened was tt... we had trainin as per normal.. at first i was shivering as i knew abt todae's PT lesson.. i hated PT since i was in pri sch and always have butterflies in my stomach nites bfor... this was not unusual... Jaysen held to my hands and calmed mi down... finally i was able to TAHAN the whole PT.. happy was i went to continue with bball trainin den five on five... i was happy it was my first full court game after two full months of rest and slackin.. i couldn't wait to just be part of the team with Zhu, Jaysen, Kar jun and lala.. i was tinkin to myself, "wow wat a perfect team" i tot i will be havin lots of fun and offence as well as defence... but NO!!! i ended crying over the games...

During the games, as usual i will be running lanes, do defence and passing ball... but wait something was wrong... i do pass the ball... did a great defence (as jaysen told mi) but wait.... i'm running the lanes and is already open and empty, WHY isn't anybody passing mi the ball.. oh ic they were waiting for jaysen... the game shark to end the game.. why would they want mi a punnie small flea endin the game for them.. haha silly mi hor!!! i ran over ten times of lanes... rejected a few and did my defence and yet Kar jun had to scold mi for sth i had no choice but do... OK imagine.. if i get the ball on the right side of the court.. suddenly everybody was crowdin my side and how am i supposed to pass the ball.. is like defenders are all ard... and Zhu was at the other end of the court.. NO ONE FREAKIN moved esp karjun.. lingerin at the back of mi den shoot mi with one sentence, "dun hold the ball too long pass it out" den i was tinkin.. teach mi how to pass, where to pass and whom to pass.. i see nobody moving... everybody is crampin at my side and zhu is evading the court wth... and the center was open.... and kar jun din noe how to run in... F*CK it la.. all is my fault la!!

The game itself was fun but to mi it was a total bore.. and i was realli hurt.. i've been runnin into lanes just nice for a lay... they din even wanna pass to mi.... okie... nvm den they started playing fast breaks.. ok i helped out and running to back them up... but NO!! they insist on going up their own... i'm like there wavin and den zhu have to sqeeze between two person just to lay and i'm there to welcome him liddat... and guess wat IT WAS A REBOUND!!! Am i tt small, short, invincble... com'on la... and they just play as if its their game.. OR RATHER it is their game... i'm not needed at all har...

Jaysen did tell mi i did a great job in defence.. but wait hu will notice defenders doin a gd job.. besides the coaches.. tell mi.... they look at offences... and all they see mi is cat walkin on the court DURING a game... i was so sad... i felt as if i'm being treat as dump... i've been trampled on... Jaysen tried to console and make mi happy again.. but i just cant let it go... its like i love the games... i love everybody.. but why cant anybody just give mi chance... or rather blive in mi... when will u guys actually blive gals.. and let them play like ur own... WHY!!

Cried my eyes out, all are swollen... wat to do I'M a gal... no one will ever notice how we feel besides our boyfriends.. RITE!